discontentment...
Snow changes everything... you walk outside and all of a sudden everything is peaceful and beautiful... the world around you is hushed and the silence is the most beautiful part about it all... it brings a new perspective and I love it. Encountering beauty always changes something inside me in an inexplicable way.
Discontentment... in my lack of knowledge of the theology that I claim to believe... in my teaching abilities... in my Christian witness and my concern for the lost... in my adherance to the quote I so often mock -> "Preach the gospel and when necessary use words"... in my selfishness in my attitude towards others... in my general apathy towards prayer and time spent with my Savior. Recently I've been seeing my own depravity and utter selfish motives at the heart of everything I do and it is ugly. I'm so incapable of good on my own and a fresh reality check is painful and humbling ... it places me with a 'fresh discontentment' that I so deeply need in order to live in full reliance of God's workings within me.
Student teaching is one of the first things I've ever done for which I feel equipped and capable... and adequate. It's always been a struggle of mine. Question... where God places you, does He always equip? I've heard phrases like, "where He calls, He provides" and "God will give you the gifts for what he asks you to do." I mean, in a very general sense I believe He does; maybe it's just not always in the ways we think it will be. For example, Moses wasn't gifted with the ability to speak, so God had Aaron to be his "mouth." I want to explore these thoughts more because I think the implications are huge for how we view calling. I am about to read a book on "faith & calling" from the head of the theology department at Lee, so I'm willing to bet I will be writing more on this subject...
"It is not what man does that determines whether his
work is sacred or secular, but why he does it." -A.W. Tozer
posted by Ashley @ 11:35 PM
3 Comments
3 Comments:
Tis' true that the Lord send us the help we need by ways we do not expect. What we should expect is that God does not deposit us in the middle of something without being present to guide us. It is great to know that there are teachers out there that are on the look out the spread a wordless christianity. Let your lifestyle do the talking and words will come when they are needed. We all want love, if you can show it, they will want it. And eventually their hungry will be so great for it they will have to go to the source, rather then sip it at the fountain.
I think we are called to live a bit more than lifestyle evangelism... as in open your mouth and speak... often... I know way too many people who live amazingly good lives that adhere to scripture yet they still lack the knowledge of the truth that apart from faith in Christ they will perish... so yes you are right, show it as well as pray that the Holy Spirit will give you the words to and change a heart of stone to a heart of flesh.
Do not get me wrong, boldness of the tongue needs to be used. However, the more I live, the more I see people who misuse words and alienate people where a simpler approach could have been used. Of course living it is harder then speaking it, but when all else fails living it speaks for itself. This is especially true if you work in an environment that does not breed openness to Christianity. Lifestyle can arouse curiosity that can be backed by words, but words not backed by lifestyle are meaningless. I do agree through that we are called to use our mouths to proclaim the gospel. Your thoughts on life are very provoking.
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